A Nightmare before Halloween

I ask you this question: Is there anyone in your life that you have difficulty dealing with?

I have a particular person that I must see on a very regular basis that gets under my skin like no other. Here are the issues I have difficulty dealing with and some of the things I would like to say to this person:


1. Everything-revolves-around-"me" Syndrome. Seriously, does it? Just because someone is doing something in their lives that doesn't correspond with your thinking or viewpoints, doesn't mean they're "bad" and if it doesn't directly relate to you - how can you have a problem with it? If I do or say something that isn't exactly what you want to hear, then just move on.


2. Gossip is Overrated! I never once in my 31 years of living have encountered one instance where gossip made someone's life better. You don't have to have a piece of everything that is going on. Who cares if so-and-so is dating that person? Why is it your business if that family goes on vacation or not? Do you really have nothing better to do that to talk about everyone else? Deal with your own life for a change and leave other's to live without your input - especially if you do not even know them!


3. No matter what - life is bad. Really?! Well, you're breathing, aren't you? It cannot be all that bad. In addition, you have a nice home, car, and a great family. How can you sleepwalk through your life and not see that your passing by the greatest gifts ever given to you? Who cares if you have to work extra, be out late, or don't get something when you first expected it - be appreciative that you're even getting the chance to do that one thing.


4. I'm a Christian, but..... You should NEVER start a sentence with this. I'm just saying....... Your family isn't perfect. No family is perfect. Please stop acting so high and mighty and looking at others as if they are on a lower scale than you. Judgement does not make you better. And starting any sentence with this quote while talking to anyone actually makes you look more like an idiot.


5. I know you're ________. You don't know ***** about me! You don't even take the time to ask about anything that is going on in my life because you're so busy talking about your "misery" or your slighted opinions of other people's lives. Please stop telling me I'm _______. If you continue, I will continue to tell you "On the contrary, I am _____." :)


Note to my readers: Thanks for reading this. It isn't meant for any of you. I just needed a chance to vent and get my feelings typed out, so that I could move on. Having these feelings the past few weeks has weighed me down on so many levels. It's not that I wouldn't say these things to this person, but for now, saying them will get me in a big ball of inconvenience. Will I tell this person someday when the opportunity arises? Probably. :)

Mourning and Never-ending Remembrance

While reading To Kill A Mockingbird this week with my sophomore advanced English classes, a certain quote stood out to me. "Children are children, but they can spot an evasion quicker than adults, and an evasion simply muddles them." - Atticus Finch

I'm very certain that this hold true in most every case. So, when I came home today after a rough day at work, I was not surprised byAvery's extra hugs. I tried to hide my emotion and just enjoy her company, but she sensed the inevitable - mom is sad.

It does not matter how many times I go through it, how many people it affects, how well prepared you think you are or how it happened. The pain is the same. It is what it is everytime. Pain is pain is pain. It does not matter how old you are or how much wiser you believe you are - death is still a very difficult, raw emotion to wrap your brain and heart around. The absence of a loved-one and, moreso, of a precious child, especially that of a vibrant student is a hard thing to swallow.

After a very emotional day at school, I realize that no matter what I say or what I do, I cannot take a person's pain away. I should know this from first-hand experience. Yet, the depths of my soul always urge me to do something to "help," even if it's just a hug or a prayer. The truth is that this day has been very difficult and I continue to struggle every minute with why. However, Kelsey was such a strong example to her peers, as well as to her teachers. She touched everyone's life without knowing the fullness of her touch. Her faith was strong and I know that her spirit is now able to be with all of those that loved her so very much.Here is a link to hear Kelsey's beautiful voice: http://www.purevolume.com/unanimouslove

Later on in the evening, here's what Avery said to me as we headed out the door to the park: "Don't let go of me, mom. Hold me tight." What an angel! This brought tears to my eyes and caused me to clench her tighter. She squealed in delight! Take time to give someone you love a big hug and when they pull away, if you feel the urge, tell them not to let go or to hold on a little tighter. You never know if that hug might be your very last with that special person. Those hugs may leave a lasting legacy.