My Peace

A long time friend recently told me, " I love reading your blogs. Although I don't often comment on them. I do read them." She also added, "You just seem like you have your whole life planned out."

While I am flattered that someone besides me out there in the cyberworld reads my blogs, her comments made me start thinking a lot about our purpose here. Everyone has a "story" and I believe that we all are suppose to learn from each other's stories of struggles and triumphs.

Journal writing is something I started when my little brother died (1988). I was 11 and have done it ever since. It REALLY does help sort out all that emotion that you have after a huge loss or any big emotional rollercoaster. I believe that we are all trying to figure out the same thing: Why am I here? What is my purpose?

Well, first, let me tell you that even though it "looks" like I have it all together and planned, things don't go the way I want them to and just like everyone else I have had my fair share of struggles. The way that I've learned to deal with all the chaos around me is to find a way to find "my peace." I think if everyone could find their very own peace within, then world peace might actually be attainable. You know?

Well, maybe you don't know. I think that everyone has to find their own peace. It is different for all of us. For some, peace is writing or singing or acting. For others, peace within might come from hunting or hobbies or running or interactions with other people. For many, they have to come to terms with that one situation in their life that they let define them and to find peace is to heal those wounds.

A few of the things that I have found help me to have that inner peace that allows me to continue doing all that I do as a mom, wife, teacher, and friend are running, yoga, a quiet lunch alone, reading a chapter a day before bed, having a cup of hot chocolate or a glass of wine while making dinner, cranking up the radio and dancing around with the girls to silly dance music, sharing a dessert with Paul in hiding from the girls, listening to Christmas music early, doing something for someone unexpectedly, smiling for no reason, surrounding myself with people who have a positive energy that rubs off onto me.

In the busyness of our world today, it seems most difficult to find even a few minutes of peace and quiet, especially if you work long hours, have a family or young children, or just put everyone else before yourself. With the holidays approaching, we all seem to find ourselves busier and more rushed than ever. Truly, though, isn't the spirit of the holidays to deeply enjoy those definite moment of happiness; not the presents, food, or events - but the people that we share all of those things with.

So, my advice for some of you is to write, act, read, hunt, have dinner on the good china, have a cup of homemade hot chocolate, try something new, call that old friend, write a letter for someone special and save it for a special occasion, do something that you did as a kid, start a new tradition, sit in silence by yourself and just breathe - As often as possible, whenever possible, and as much as possible.

Letting Go of Understanding

I sign up for these little daily readings and the one below seemed to be just for me. Actually, I'm certain that you'll probably be able to relate in some way, also.

"All of us who seek to be conscious and aware regard our experiences as teachers, and we try to discern what lessons we are learning from the things that happen in our lives. Sometimes the lesson is very clear from the get-go, and other times we have to really search to understand the deeper meaning behind some event. While this search often yields results, there also comes a point in the search where what we really need to do is move forward. It is possible that we are not meant to know the deeper meaning of certain occurrences. Answers may come later in our lives, or they may come as a result of letting go, or they may never come. Sometimes we are just playing a necessary part in a process with a result larger than we can understand. It may have very little to do with us personally, and while that can be hard to understand, it can also free us from overthinking the matter."

Wow. There are several things/people in my life that I need to "let go" of and stop trying to "understand." I believe that as human beings, we often have such a curiousity to just know and understand as if we were entitled. Oftentimes, however, the situation isn't really for us to understand: sickness, illness, tragedy, death, loss, difficult relationships. If we were told "why" would we really be able to wrap our minds around it all or is it all too big for us to even fathom? I, personally, believe the latter and have decided to continue to work on the "let go" phase of my life.