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Thursday, February 21, 2008

Greater Power

It seems that stress has overtaken me in some form, possibly subconsciously, because tonight I'm battling a flare up with my Crohn's disease. I was "diagnosed" with this as an eleven year old, but as I get older I wonder if it could possibly be IBS or some other closely related issue. No matter, whenever I have not been eating right, sleeping well, or allowing stress to overtake me, I end up in bed, with pain, barely able to walk and drown myself with lots of water and red tea. I know several others who have more severe cases and so I consider myself very lucky to be able to control my symptoms with diet, exercise and rest.

As this episode has allowed me more time resting, I've made progress with my book A New Earth. Before I discuss the ideas I've read in this book, I'd like to illustrate some of my thoughts from past blogs and a few of the ideas I've read in Tolle's book.


Many people have probably seen this photo. Each time I see this picture, I see myself in the reflection. I know that most times, I see only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to my potential, my looks, my reality. However, there is so much more to all of us than just the "tip of the iceberg." We have so much more power within us below the surface and some of us go our whole lives without ever tapping into that part of ourselves.

Here are some things I've been reading and meditating on tonight:

  • To sin means to live unskillfully, blindly, and thus to suffer or cause suffering.

  • The more you make your thoughts/beliefs into your identity, the more cut off you are from the spiritual dimension within yourself. Many "religious" people are stuck at this level. Through their "beliefs" they can make themselves "right" and others "wrong" and so religions, to a large extent become divisive rather than unifying forces.

  • Could heaven possibly not be a location but rather an inner realm of consciousness?

  • Words, no matter whether they are vocalized and made into sounds or remain unspoken as thoughts, can cast an almost hypnotic spell upon you.

  • Life isn't as serious as my mind makes it out to be.

  • The egoic mind allows us to identify ourselves with things: my car, my house, my clothes; instead of realizing that we will have to let go of these things at some point, perhaps soon. Will we become less when we let go of these things? Has who I am become diminished by the loss?

  • "If someone takes your shirt, let him have your coat as well." Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on.

  • How do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at this moment.
All of that and I'm not even finished with Chapter 2. . . .

Your Own Way

I've always set my own goals and taken steps to obtain them no matter what anyone else expected of me or wanted me to do. Being a teacher might not have seemed obtainable to others and might have been a lowered profession for others, but we are not molded by what others think of us or by what they expect us to do. We need to find our own way. I thought today's Daily OM restates this perfectly:

A lack of confidence today could lead you to disregard your aspirations and conform to the whims of others. You also may feel compelled to seek approval from authority figures or loved ones by adhering to their wishes rather than concentrating on your needs. Your efforts could lead to dissatisfaction if what others want from you or for you is not in alignment with what you want for yourself. You will feel happier and more fulfilled today if you can believe in yourself and validate yourself. Try taking pleasure in your own successes by cheering yourself on as if you were a good friend. By affirming your worth, you can take pride in your achievements.

When you are the source of your esteem, you don’t have to spend time worrying about what other people will think. Besides, the need for validation from other people often arises when we forget to validate ourselves. It’s amazing how quickly others begin to reflect our sentiments once we approve of ourselves. We become free once we realize that other people’s opinions have no bearing on what we do—rather, they are the mirror that shows us how we see ourselves. Cultivate self-worth today, and you can craft your life without worrying about pleasing others.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

I Must Be Crazy

For the past month, I've continually seen the ad/announcement/e-mail from Ticketmaster for the show "Elmo Grows Up." Each time I see it, I think how much Avery would LOVE to go, but have just blown it off and moved on.

Tonight, however, I was online and got yet another e-mail from ticketmaster. I decided to log into my account and see how much tickets would cost and when/if we'd be able to go. Within a matter of a few minutes, Paul and I decided to get Avery and I tickets. Paul agreed to take Maddie to a new movie she's been wanting to see that might be a tad bit scary to Avery. (Spiderwick Chronicles)

When Maddie was 2 1/2 we took her to Dora Explorer Live! She had a blast and has talked about her memory of it since. It is a bit early for Avery's birthday, but I'm hoping that she will be able to have the same fond memories of going to a show, too.


Am I crazy? Maybe, but I try to live what I preach - live each day to the fullest, make each day full of memories and learn to take risks and fly by the seat of your pants........

Elmo...here we come!

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Life is a Flower

Wow. It's been a while since I've blogged. Life has been busy and there seems to be less time for me to sit down and put my thoughts on "paper."

Technology:Last week, I had the opportunity to go to an Apple conference called "21st Century Learning" with our superintendent and educators from our other campuses. There's no other word to describe it except a-m-a-z-i-n-g. What you probably remember of your school days has been transcended by one-t0-one learning. Every student (us) was issued a laptop. We proceeded to take them with us to each session we attended. Each session was a simulated classroom where we learned about things like channelization. We were assigned to collaborate with our groups and upload our "research" to our class wiki and then our blog. We then created a script and recorded it as a podcast which was then also uploaded to our wiki. The science session was quite interesting and included a project where we plugged in a "probe" that would then test each water samples we had and give us a reading on how much sodium was in the water. The last device we used was a microscope that hooked up to our laptops. We took extremely close-up pictures of different things from our simulated "river project" and uploaded all the pics and created an iPhoto book with all of our research from the day.

Our district has been researching the "one-to-one" initiative since August. When the new high school opens in August 2008, each computer lab will be filled with Apple instead of PC. Now that I've seen firsthand what this could do for teacher and students, I'm game. It allows our classrooms to be one click away from the rest of the world and allows every student to collaborate with not only their own peers, but students from other countries in other schools. Yes, it is possible to do this without Apple, but from my experience they are the only computer corporation that makes it EASY to access lesson plans, other educators, and a variety of easy-to-use tools for the purpose of teaching. I was so exhausted from a long day of learning that I was in bed by 8:30 that night. Learning is hard work!


Friends: My time with friends this last week has been so refreshing! Since I've lived here I haven't really ever found my niche with friends. Sure, I have friends that I work with; some really great, true, inspirational friends are those that I see each day at work. However, my thoughts have always been that having a few really good friends are much better than lots of acquaintances. Since Madison started kindergarten, she has been greatly blessed with a few really good friends. They enjoy each other's company, giggle at all the same inside jokes, and could spend hours together doing nothing. Through Madison's friends, I've found some really great ladies who have brought new life to my much lacking social life.

Kim - I cannot believe we've known each other for a year and a half. It seems that it should be much longer. She's a great cook, a creative mom, and the most fun person to just hang out with or spend late nights painting. And it's a rare thing, but our husbands get along as well as we do and as well as the kids and we're last minute people, which means we end up together usually at a moments notice. My favorite memory with her was this past Friday when I was privileged enough to spend Shabbat with them. It's fun to have someone to have "inside jokes" with: licking walls, spanking snails, and the ultimate "What was that noise? Oh! Someone hit me with the Wii remote?"

Jen- She inspires me. After many years in the corporate world, she's venturing off and going back to school. Her goal? To teach middle school math. Wow. First off, I'm not great at math. I can do it, but there are still some things I don't get and have accepted that I won't get. Second, I am certified to teach middle school, but notice - I don't. The only way I would agree to it is if they brought back Fear Factor and offered me a million dollars. :) Jen is always on top of it and isn't scared to take a leap of faith/friendship, either, and read books with me. Who else would agree to read The Grapes of Wrath with me without someone forcing them to?

Lisa - We hit it off right away. She is a mom of 3. My hero. :) She's also a great cook who's originally from Chicago. Her Italian family knows how to cook and so my hope is that she'll teach me a thing or two about great Italian dishes. We've only had a few meetings, but she knows just how to make us feel at home. She and the others know what I mean when I say "family drama" and she is familiar with Joel Osteen - which gives me someone to discuss my "iPod runs" with.

Family Dynamic: Who knew that a single dining room table would bring us all much closer together? Paul and I have not bought many pieces of furniture together since we've been married, simply because it was either a gift or a hand-me-down. So, this Saturday after months of saving, looking, and speculating we set out to purchase a new dining room table and chairs. After 3 hours, we were finally sitting down all together with plenty of room and enough room to seat 6 more. We've changed our eating habits from watching TV and eating to actually spending more time in the kitchen than ever. We work here, eat here, play games here, and discuss how life is like a flower here. Ha! Just kidding! Truthfully, though, had I known it would make THAT much of a difference, we'd bought one LONG ago. :)

Books: I'm multi-reading right now. Still working on Freedom Writers, The Grapes of Wrath, and have just began reading A New Earth, Oprah's new book club book. I'm wondering, though, if I should begin reading books on tape. Then, I'd have way more time to contemplate the whole life/flower concept. :)

Life is blooming all around us. Each day that passes we are blooming into the people that we were meant to be, learning who we are, and what we are capable of doing. We should seize each moment because life changes slowly and almost without notice.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Blah, Blah, Blah

The word "blah"is actually listed at dictionary.com and has the following synonyms: banausic, boring, dim, dreary, humdrum, lifeless, monotone, monotonous, pedestrian, plodding

This has been my feeling since about 9:00 this morning and to follow through with my committment to write about all things in my life - even the not so exciting, I had to blog today.

It wasn't that anything went particularly wrong at all today, but the "blah" cloud seemed to follow me around today, even into the pantry. My husband would say that it's simply because today is Tuesday. It is the "blah" of all the week days because there's nothing really exciting about it - Monday you talk about your weekend, Wednesday is "hump" day, Thursday you're making weekend plans, Friday always rocks, Saturday and Sunday are usually yours to do with what you want. And, so, Tuesday is the "alone" day of the week. Maybe.

I have this problem of always lending a hand to others in my job, even when I know good and well I do not have time to do the extra stuff, because that will just cause me to be extra behind for that day. So, a few favors here and there today put me behind a lot and I ended up missing 1/2 of a class that I really needed to be teaching today and left me feeling flustered for most of the day.

Next, I will just say that I mostly never need any encouragement from outside sources on a job well done. I'm pretty good at using my own inner motivation and positive thinking to keep moving forward. However, it is nice to hear "Good job!" or "Well done! at anytime. So, today I was feeling a bit neglected when someone was being recognized for something that I already do. Why? Is it because I'm already the technology teacher and should already "know" and be moving above and beyond?

Tomorrow is our staff meeting (I call them staff "beatings") bright and early at 7:15. Do you comprehend how difficult it is for a mom of 2 girls to get to a meeting dressed neatly, makeup, hair, and ready to teach 100 kids that day with all her own children at their designated places? Thank goodness for Paul. He always pulls through and takes one for the team on these days. Usually these meetings are nothing more than can be said in a nice memo. And, no, there are no door prizes to obtain.

There was somewhere I REALLY wanted to be tonight, but due to short notice and it being a school night, I simply could not go. I call it a "once in a lifetime" but my realistic friends pointed out that I could always see this person another time or continue contact via e-mail. *Sigh* They are right and I concede.

Now that I'm home I decided to come up with a "blah" dinner. As I was searching for things in our pantry, I found a bag of old sourdough bread that was buried beneath marshmallows and pita chips. Nice. I was successful in getting the green, gooey, watery mess into the garbage before it found the floor.

My "blah" dinner, you ask?

Hamburger meat, browned with onions and garlic with a sprinkle of bread crumbs. Add cooked spaghetti, tomato sauce, more bread crumbs, Parmesan cheese, mozzarella cheese, and feta cheese. Bake at 250 until cheese is melted.

I just made it up. Possibly there is a dish out there like it that exists, but I just decided to throw in whatever we had that wasn't green and watery. I know the girls and Paul will be glad that I used my blah-ness in order to produce something edible that is not take out or frozen.

Thank goodness tomorrow is Wednesday!

Friday, February 1, 2008

Going Back To School

School House Rock! that is....

In case you are not familiar with this 70's and 80's icon, it is a series of 52 educational short films featuring songs that were released between 1973-1986, with a few "newbies" in the early 90's. Baby Boomers and Gen Xers are probably familiar with this fun way of learning. Earlier in the school year, I took a day off to go with Madison's class to see a theatre version of this American classic. It brought back so many fun, exciting memories for me as I reverted back to my childhood days of watching Saturday morning cartoons sprawled out on the floor with a blanket, a pillow and some breakfast.

Last night, I went to YouTube, a place I rarely frequent, because Madison asked me a question about groups of five's. I thought SHR would be a great way to get her to understand what I was saying. It did. Paul and I ended up sitting and watching 6 of the short videos with Madison and Avery. They were mesmerized with the songs and cartoons and were begging me at bedtime to let them watch just one more!

Here is a list of my favorites, including a few of the forgotten greats. Hope you enjoy them again and find some joy in sharing them with a new generation of learners!


Interjections!

Ready or Not Here I Come

Conjunction Junction

I'm Just a Bill

Three is a Magic Number

Figure 8

The Tale of Mr. Morton
(my personal fav)

A Noun Is A Person, Place or Thing

My Hero, Zero

(Had to throw in a free ad for my friend, SQuire Rushnell. Here is SQuire speaking about his first book on FOX News. My personal connection to SHR is SQuire Rushnell. While at ABC as Vice President of Family Programs he fathered the acclaimed Schoolhouse Rock series and ABC After School Specials capturing 75 Emmy Awards. SQuire is also the author of the When God Winks series, including When God Winks on Love, the book in which mine and Paul's story appears. We had the great privilege of meeting SQuire shortly after his second book was released.)